The Official Unemployed Professors Blog

  • Can Turnitin Detect Essays Bought Online?

    Can Turnitin Detect Essays Bought Online?

    When it comes to academic integrity, plagiarism is a no-no. Maybe even the BIGGEST no-no. But can Turnitin really sniff out those sneaky essays you bought online from the digital equivalent of a guy in a dark alley? The short answer is…it’s complicated. What does TurnitIn do? Turnitin, the software used by many universities and…

  • Plagiarism Checking: Does it really work?

    Plagiarism Checking: Does it really work?

    Plagiarism checking has become an unfortunate extra step in the drudgery of the essay writing process. Thanks to the arms race between students and teachers, the general dynamic is that all students are presumed guilty of plagiarism until proven innocent by a for-profit algorithm. With that lovely thought in mind, let’s explore the fascinating world…

  • AI Essay Writing: The Risks of Using An Essay Bot

    AI Essay Writing: The Risks of Using An Essay Bot

    Unless you’ve been living under a rock or in a coma, you’ve probably heard about the explosion of new AI programs that help with writing. The development of a technology called GPT-3, which basically an operating system for artificial intelligence text, has kickstarted a burgeoning industry in AI essay writing. TikTok and YouTube have exploded…

  • Is Unemployed Professors Legit?

    Is Unemployed Professors Legit?

    People ask this all the time (even though they should be asking “Are Unemployed Professors legit?”). And we get it. If we’re so brilliant, how are we still unemployed? (Our moms want to know this, too). Why should you trust sarcastic strangers on the Internet whose entire brand revolves around unemployment and tweed? With so much…

  • Common App Essay Prompts 2022-2023 (Part 3)

    Common App Essay Prompts 2022-2023 (Part 3)

    Welcome to Part 3 of our blog series on how to write the Common App essay for 2022-2023! In Part 1 of this series, we introduced the Common App essay prompts for the 2022-2023 school year and compared them to the prompts from last year, and went over the first essay option. In part 2,…

  • Common App Essay Prompts 2022-2023 (Part 2)

      In Part 1 of this series, we introduced the Common App essay prompts for the 2022-2023 school year, comparing them to the prompts from last year. We also dove a bit into the first Common App essay prompt. Today, we’re discussing the second essay option for this year’s Common App, starting with what they’re…

  • Common App Essay Prompts 2022-2023 (Part 1)

    They’re here (well, they’ve been out since January, but let’s be real – you probably haven’t looked at them yet). The Common App, the most popular application for colleges, has announced the essay prompts for the 2022-2023 application season. Students who use the Common App must choose one of these prompts for their essay. Most…

  • Essays about your dysfunctional family

    We are incorrigible know-it-alls, so we recently launched a Quora. Now, whenever we have downtime from slavishly polishing the world’s best essays, we’re answering some of Quora users’ toughest questions with our trademark combination of reliable information and sarcastic style. Recently, a Quora user asked, “How do you write a college essay about your family?”…

  • Essay etiquette: Should you thank your reader?

    You might know this already, but we’re incorrigible know-it-alls. That’s why we recently launched a Quora. Now, whenever we have downtime from slavishly polishing the world’s best essays for you, our beloved clients, you can find us answering some of Quora users’ toughest questions with our trademark combination of reliable information and sarcastic style. Recently,…

  • The “perfect” personal statement

    We are incorrigible know-it-alls, so we recently launched a Quora. Now, whenever we have downtime from slavishly polishing the world’s best essays, we’re answering some of Quora users’ toughest questions with our trademark combination of reliable information and sarcastic style. Recently, a Quora user asked, “How do I write a perfect personal statement as an…

  • Some Thoughts on COVID Vaccines and Aspiration

    Some Thoughts on COVID Vaccines and Aspiration

    By Professor Rogue I believe that COVID MRNA vaccines are safe and effective in terms of preventing severe COVID. Here at Unemployed Professors, opinions differ amongst professors, and we have all written many custom essays about COVID and its implications on the economy. I have written so many custom essays about COVID-19 that I have…

  • The Biden Presidency: An Objective Examination of Inaction

    The Biden Presidency: An Objective Examination of Inaction

    By Professor Rogue As a ghostwriter for Unemployed Professors, I have written a lot of custom essays either praising or critiquing Donald Trump and Joe Biden. Back in the day, I did the same for Obama and Bush. I had not started ghostwriting when Clinton was in office, or I would have written custom essays…

  • Methodological Education and Genealogy

    Methodological Education and Genealogy

    Written by Professor Rogue I sometimes reflect on the qualitative and quantitative methodological course that I took during graduate school, as I entered the world of academic ghostwriting with Unemployed Professors, and feel like these methods courses were a waste of time. While I have worked on a lot of methodological projects and custom essays…

  • Zoom is Destroying Our Ability to Interact

    Zoom is Destroying Our Ability to Interact

      Written by Professor Rouge While I am an academic ghostwriter at Unemployed Professors, I also teach university and have other personal and business interests that require me to use zoom. In the classroom, Zoom has represented a lifesaver for allowing us to continue teaching during the Pandemic but has dramatically detracted from the degree…

  • The Upcoming Russian Invasion of Ukraine

    The Upcoming Russian Invasion of Ukraine

    Written by Professor-Rogue As an academic ghostwriter for UnemployedProfessors, I write a lot in the areas of Political Science and International Relations because this is the field in which I obtained my doctoral degree. With this expertise in mind, and considering that I studied Russia extensively as a graduate student, I feel the need to…

  • Omicron and Essay Writing

    Omicron and Essay Writing

    By Professor-Rogue   As an academic ghostwriter, I am used to working with students in very difficult moments. While some of my clients use me to write all of their essays, others only come to me when they are experiencing an emergency like a death in the family or a serious illness. While their professors…

  • Writing a College Entry Essay

    Writing a College Entry Essay

    Many students make the mistake of writing the entry essay in the same way they’d craft a term paper: the introduction is thus a mere description of what will be discussed in the rest of the document.  An example of this approach might be, “I am well prepared for the demands of university thanks to…

  • Expository Essays

    Expository Essays

    Expository essays set out to provide information in an explanatory fashion. Persuasive essays, on the other hand, attempt to present a specific point of view with the aim of bringing the reader into an agreement. An example of exposition might be what a professor would present in a lecture: he is trying to explain a…

  • Unemployed Professors Adds Crypto Payment Option for Customers

    Unemployed Professors Adds Crypto Payment Option for Customers

    Unemployed Professors, one of the most trusted names in academic writing, has always put you first. It’s why we have the best professors, the best customer service, and the best sense of humor. Today, we’re proud to announce that we’ve launched a new payment option: Crypto. That’s right – you can now deposit crypto to…

  • Choosing A Paper Writing Service

    Choosing A Paper Writing Service

    The five areas we recommend you focus on are Reputation, Cost, Customer Support, Author Expertise, and Revision and Refund Policy.  Two other areas to be considered separately are making sure you won’t get caught, and timeliness.

  • Happy Procrastinator’s Day!!

    Happy Procrastinator’s Day!!

    We’re sorry we forgot Valentine’s Day, and President’s Day, and even Mardi Gras. But we’ve got something even better for you than a cheesy valentine, stale candy hearts that taste like toothpaste, bad Abe Lincoln hat, or plastic beads to wear in lieu of a shirt.   We know you’ve been waiting to get around…

  • Dorm-et Cooking Part Two: Basic Rules

    Dorm-et Cooking Part Two: Basic Rules

      One of the best things about a rice cooker is that you can throw stuff in and walk away. This is perfect for students. But how do you decide what to cook, and why would you want to when there are microwave burritos to be consumed? If you only have a tiny fridge and…

  • “Dorm-et” Cooking: The Basics

    “Dorm-et” Cooking: The Basics

          Whether you’re living at home or hunkered down in a decidedly un-fun dorm, nobody likes spending a lot of money on groceries or eating cafeteria food. And let’s face it, Hot Pockets and microwave burritos are fart and sodium bombs. But between COVID impacting university life and even how you get groceries…

  • How Students Can Vote in the 2020 Election

    How Students Can Vote in the 2020 Election

      Are you American? Do you have strong opinions about where the country is or should be going? Do you enjoy standing in line and getting stickers while watching the world burn? Are you a student confused about how to register, especially during this fabulous plague year? Then you probably want to know how you…