The Official Unemployed Professors Blog

  • Common App Essay Prompts 2022-2023 (Part 1)

    They’re here (well, they’ve been out since January, but let’s be real – you probably haven’t looked at them yet). The Common App, the most popular application for colleges, has announced the essay prompts for the 2022-2023 application season. Students who use the Common App must choose one of these prompts for their essay. Most…

  • Essays about your dysfunctional family

    We are incorrigible know-it-alls, so we recently launched a Quora. Now, whenever we have downtime from slavishly polishing the world’s best essays, we’re answering some of Quora users’ toughest questions with our trademark combination of reliable information and sarcastic style. Recently, a Quora user asked, “How do you write a college essay about your family?”…

  • Essay etiquette: Should you thank your reader?

    You might know this already, but we’re incorrigible know-it-alls. That’s why we recently launched a Quora. Now, whenever we have downtime from slavishly polishing the world’s best essays for you, our beloved clients, you can find us answering some of Quora users’ toughest questions with our trademark combination of reliable information and sarcastic style. Recently,…

  • The “perfect” personal statement

    We are incorrigible know-it-alls, so we recently launched a Quora. Now, whenever we have downtime from slavishly polishing the world’s best essays, we’re answering some of Quora users’ toughest questions with our trademark combination of reliable information and sarcastic style. Recently, a Quora user asked, “How do I write a perfect personal statement as an…

  • Some Thoughts on COVID Vaccines and Aspiration

    Some Thoughts on COVID Vaccines and Aspiration

    By Professor Rogue I believe that COVID MRNA vaccines are safe and effective in terms of preventing severe COVID. Here at Unemployed Professors, opinions differ amongst professors, and we have all written many custom essays about COVID and its implications on the economy. I have written so many custom essays about COVID-19 that I have…

  • The Biden Presidency: An Objective Examination of Inaction

    The Biden Presidency: An Objective Examination of Inaction

    By Professor Rogue As a ghostwriter for Unemployed Professors, I have written a lot of custom essays either praising or critiquing Donald Trump and Joe Biden. Back in the day, I did the same for Obama and Bush. I had not started ghostwriting when Clinton was in office, or I would have written custom essays…

  • Methodological Education and Genealogy

    Methodological Education and Genealogy

    Written by Professor Rogue I sometimes reflect on the qualitative and quantitative methodological course that I took during graduate school, as I entered the world of academic ghostwriting with Unemployed Professors, and feel like these methods courses were a waste of time. While I have worked on a lot of methodological projects and custom essays…

  • Zoom is Destroying Our Ability to Interact

    Zoom is Destroying Our Ability to Interact

      Written by Professor Rouge While I am an academic ghostwriter at Unemployed Professors, I also teach university and have other personal and business interests that require me to use zoom. In the classroom, Zoom has represented a lifesaver for allowing us to continue teaching during the Pandemic but has dramatically detracted from the degree…

  • The Upcoming Russian Invasion of Ukraine

    The Upcoming Russian Invasion of Ukraine

    Written by Professor-Rogue As an academic ghostwriter for UnemployedProfessors, I write a lot in the areas of Political Science and International Relations because this is the field in which I obtained my doctoral degree. With this expertise in mind, and considering that I studied Russia extensively as a graduate student, I feel the need to…

  • Omicron and Essay Writing

    Omicron and Essay Writing

    By Professor-Rogue   As an academic ghostwriter, I am used to working with students in very difficult moments. While some of my clients use me to write all of their essays, others only come to me when they are experiencing an emergency like a death in the family or a serious illness. While their professors…

  • Writing a College Entry Essay

    Writing a College Entry Essay

    Many students make the mistake of writing the entry essay in the same way they’d craft a term paper: the introduction is thus a mere description of what will be discussed in the rest of the document.  An example of this approach might be, “I am well prepared for the demands of university thanks to…

  • Expository Essays

    Expository Essays

    Expository essays set out to provide information in an explanatory fashion. Persuasive essays, on the other hand, attempt to present a specific point of view with the aim of bringing the reader into an agreement. An example of exposition might be what a professor would present in a lecture: he is trying to explain a…

  • Unemployed Professors Adds Crypto Payment Option for Customers

    Unemployed Professors Adds Crypto Payment Option for Customers

    Unemployed Professors, one of the most trusted names in academic writing, has always put you first. It’s why we have the best professors, the best customer service, and the best sense of humor. Today, we’re proud to announce that we’ve launched a new payment option: Crypto. That’s right – you can now deposit crypto to…

  • Choosing A Paper Writing Service

    Choosing A Paper Writing Service

    The five areas we recommend you focus on are Reputation, Cost, Customer Support, Author Expertise, and Revision and Refund Policy.  Two other areas to be considered separately are making sure you won’t get caught, and timeliness.

  • Happy Procrastinator’s Day!!

    Happy Procrastinator’s Day!!

    We’re sorry we forgot Valentine’s Day, and President’s Day, and even Mardi Gras. But we’ve got something even better for you than a cheesy valentine, stale candy hearts that taste like toothpaste, bad Abe Lincoln hat, or plastic beads to wear in lieu of a shirt.   We know you’ve been waiting to get around…

  • Dorm-et Cooking Part Two: Basic Rules

    Dorm-et Cooking Part Two: Basic Rules

      One of the best things about a rice cooker is that you can throw stuff in and walk away. This is perfect for students. But how do you decide what to cook, and why would you want to when there are microwave burritos to be consumed? If you only have a tiny fridge and…

  • “Dorm-et” Cooking: The Basics

    “Dorm-et” Cooking: The Basics

          Whether you’re living at home or hunkered down in a decidedly un-fun dorm, nobody likes spending a lot of money on groceries or eating cafeteria food. And let’s face it, Hot Pockets and microwave burritos are fart and sodium bombs. But between COVID impacting university life and even how you get groceries…

  • How Students Can Vote in the 2020 Election

    How Students Can Vote in the 2020 Election

      Are you American? Do you have strong opinions about where the country is or should be going? Do you enjoy standing in line and getting stickers while watching the world burn? Are you a student confused about how to register, especially during this fabulous plague year? Then you probably want to know how you…

  • Tips for maximizing online learning during COVID-19

    Tips for maximizing online learning during COVID-19

    Deleuzienne here with some tips for trying to get the most out of a disappointing term! So you’re paying tuition for a term of Zoom and quarantine. Bad luck. If it’s any comfort, your professors really would have preferred to meet in person with you, too! I’ve tried to come up with some useful and…

  • Hey, welcome to our summer solstice newsletter!*

    Hey, welcome to our summer solstice newsletter!*

    Can you believe it’s already the summer solstice? Considering that 2020 may be the longest year in human history, seems like a good time to reflect on the tsunami of current events the first half of 2020 has barfed onto us. Looking back over this year, it seems like it was only a few short…

  • Letter from Unemployed Professors on Covid19

    Letter from Unemployed Professors on Covid19

    These are tough times. The whole world is shuttered, Amazon is out of everything, many people have lost their jobs and your local grocery store has turned into Mad Max cosplay. Do you battle to the death for the last package of toilet paper or do you cough on the person next to you to…

  • The Fate of Universities

    The Fate of Universities

      University education used to be much more idealistic in nature, and derived from a perceived need to enlighten and ennoble, rather than merely professionalize.  Today, university education is viewed much differently.  It might not be unfair, in fact, to suggest that universities today are merely glorified vocational colleges.  Gone is the ‘Ivory Tower,’ replaced…

  • How to Get Along with College Roommates

    How to Get Along with College Roommates

    Even those who are highly extroverted, come from large families, and had several siblings may struggle to get along with college roommates.  Lack of restraint imposed by absence of authority figures, and the more permissive moral environment on many campuses often invites college students to misbehavior.  It is therefore unsurprising that those with college ambitions…

  • College Dating Tips

    College Dating Tips

      College is a pivotal, coming-of-age experience in which students experience previously unenjoyed freedoms.  For some, the parental guidance they have received, and their personal level of maturity allow for responsible enjoyment of newfound liberty.  Most, however, are unprepared.  When exploring new romantic and sexual freedoms, this can result in unwanted and even destructive results.…