Nobody likes job interviews. They are a weird combination of everything that sucks about a first date, without even the distant possibility of hooking up at the end (if you are the type of person who hooks up at the end of job interviews, you probably don’t need this article). Adding to the stress are the facts that you need to do well at an interview to get a job and you need a job to pay for food. Here are some tips to reduce the stress:

1. Practice, practice, practice. Oh, yeah, everyone has told you to have a practice job interview. It’s boring as hell, but actually pretty good advice. Try it at your school’s career center, try it with your friends, or ask a professor (or all of the above).
2. Just like you Google-stalk your dates before going out (come on, you totally do), you should find out a little about the person who will be interviewing you; if you don’t know the exact name of your interviewer, you should look up the company. Don’t just look at their website, look up what other people are saying about them. Have a few comments and suggestions for them. For example, if you’re interviewing for a restaurant, consider the negative Yelp reviews they inevitably have and be ready to propose a few concrete action steps for them to remedy the issue.
3. If you have anxiety, manage it. I don’t mean to drug yourself into a stupor, but I mean think carefully about what makes you anxious and how you can soothe yourself. If you take medications that do not impair your judgment, take them well ahead of time.
4. Do the usual things. Dress professionally for the context, and if you happen to know the office is extra casual or extra conservative, dress accordingly. Be polite and follow cues from the interviewer and others in the office (if they say it’s okay, use first names).
5. Think before you speak, and try not to psych yourself out. At the end of the day, the job interview is just a conversation in a professional setting. You don’t have to ace your first job interview, and you only have to ace one to get a job. Sometimes you botch an interview, and that’s okay. Sometimes you botch an interview and still get the job. As long as you came out of the interview with some insight as to what you did and how to do better next time, then you’ve already aced it.

One of our friendly, tweed-wearing Unemployed Professors is happy to help you with your next term paper.

Everyone dreams of throwing a killer spring break party. But there is so much work that goes into party planning. Here are some tips to help make sure your party is a success:

1. Plan early and plan strategically. Plan your party for a night when everyone will be in town, but not when they are cramming for midterms. Spring break parties can be tough because you want to get people after midterms, but before they go away for the break or before dorms close.
2. Get decorations for cheap without getting gouged on seasonal things. Oriental Trading, Goodwill (or any used goods store), Michael’s / JoAnn’s and the Dollar Store are all great options for cheap party decorations, and you could even re-use them for future parties.
3. Come up with a theme and go all out. Themed parties are more fun and give people more to anticipate, which is half the fun of a party. Consider deciding on the theme AFTER you go shopping for decorations, since you don’t want to be locked into anything if another theme is cheaper! A North Pole Spring Break could mean cheap clearance decorations and an interesting twist for decorations and activities– think Sexy Santa and Mrs. Claus or Naughty Elves in a Hot Tub. Be creative!
4. Organize the space you will have the party. You will want to have water stations, multiple bathrooms, and places for people to crash if they get too drunk to drive. For real, if you aren’t prepared to let guests sleep it off on your couch, don’t throw a party. You can even appointment someone the “key guardian” and have people check in their car keys when they get there. Be sure you have “puke points” aplenty, and trash / recycling stations for empties. Bonus points if you live in an area where you can get the bottle deposits back: it’s like a small party refund!
5. Consider the weather and be flexible. Spring break, in some areas, is Spring Break in Name Only, and pool parties in March may not actually be fun. Similarly, unseasonably warm weather might make people wishing they were outside, instead of at an indoor dance party. Be ready to move the party inside or outside, or put up a tent, if the weather might change.

One of our friendly, tweed-wearing Unemployed Professors is happy to help you with your next writing project.

Of course, the best extracurricular activity to improve your chances at a job is an actual job, but when you can’t, or when you want to stay on campus, it’s important to pick extracurricular activities that will pay off in terms of fun, resume building, or network building. But when you’re walking the cafeteria tables at the activity fair, and everyone is earnestly making eye contact for you for clubs ranging from African Dance to Zoophilia (it’s for volunteering at the zoo, you sicko), how can you decide?

Nothing is guaranteed to get you a job, and ultimately, the activities you choose aren’t as important as the roles you take on within them and the ways that you can demonstrate leadership and skill building. Passively attending the Vagina Monologues for Feminist Club is great, but becoming treasurer of the acapella singing group or writing a successful travel grant to help your group compete is even better.

Ultimately, you should sit down and think about what story you want to tell about your skills on your resume or C.V.. Then you should pursue activities that, first and foremost, you value and find fun. Next, infiltrate those organizations and become leader (I mean, join them and become proactive). The important thing is not which activities you choose, but the roles you take on within them, and the . Quirky activities may get you eyeballs, but being able to demonstrate or quantify your achievements will get you further than being able to say you were a warm body in a room: “I started a tutoring program for inner-city youths. By the end of the first year, we matched 10 middle schoolers to tutors and on average, the students’ GPAs improved by half a letter grade.” “After I became treasurer of horseback riding club, I implemented a service program to provide grants to autistic children, and we got a state-level grant for $500 that let us provide 20 hours of lessons to autistic children. I also improved my teaching and speaking abilities while doing this.” See? Even “fun” activities can help you on the job market or at an interview – if you can prove that you developed or honed important skills while doing them. Nothing in life is guaranteed, but demonstrated success and leadership in a few extracurricular activities is far better than simply checking off a list – and in many cases, it’s better to be a big fish in a small pond (i.e., leader of a more obscure club) than just another face in the crowd of a bigger one.

One of our friendly, tweed-wearing Unemployed Professors is happy to help you tame the essay writing monster.

If you have writer’s block, you might feel like you have nothing to say. You might barely be able to get your fingers to move on the keyboard. All you can think about is the deadline and the clock ticking ever forward. What should you do in such situations?

1. Just keep writing. Tape the delete key down if you have to (hey, that’s why God or Bill Gates or whoever invented spell check, right?). Just like time only goes forward, make yourself write. Write even if all you are writing is “Shit. Fuck. My deadline is in 4 hours and I haven’t got anything to say.” Brainstorm and brain dump anything and everything – you’ll be surprised at what you come up with, and once ideas are in text, they are much harder to throw away. Don’t let yourself delete anything, and don’t let yourself take your hands off the keyboard (or page).
2. Another strategy is to write with two documents open. One is the one that will become your final product: your term paper, grant proposal, fan fiction, whatever. The other is your “text pasture.” Here is where you will put everything and anything you can think of, even if it makes no sense, even if it’s profanity or a grocery list or a profanity-laden grocery list.
3. You can nip writer’s block in the bud by getting in the habit of writing every day. 750words.com is a great way to start this. If you make writing a part of your daily life, you can train yourself to write more easily, even when you’re “not feeling it.”
4. Take a walk. Some of the greatest writers took walks. Some of the greatest scientists have found there is a connection between physical activity and creativity. Let yourself take a 10 or 15-minute break for a quick walk, then revisit your blank page. If you’re not into walking, try some yoga or even just stretching.
5. If you are using a word processor, try the ‘Focus’ view. If you can’t Facebook or Google or whatever, you will get more done.

One of our friendly, tweed-wearing Unemployed Professors is happy to help you with your next writing project.

So, you’ve graduated. Congratulations! You have a diploma, at least three copies of Oh the Places You’ll Go, and a wrenching hangover. How do you become a financial grown-up when you couldn’t even keep enough money in your meal plan to get a pizza at the end of the semester? These five money moves are a good start.

1. The first thing you should do is look at your credit report (not just the score). Make sure you know anything that’s on there, and begin the process to dispute anything that you did not initiate. This is just good financial housekeeping and you should get in the habit of doing it quarterly. You should be 100% certain of exactly where you stand with student loans, credit cards, and so on. Get started with your free credit report.
2. Next, make a budget or spending plan. Consider what your priorities are and if possible, use numbers from your first salary – then plan for living off of less than you earn. Be realistic and know yourself a little bit. If you love going out to restaurants, budget for it. If you would rather drive a nice car, then accept that – and consider living in a cheaper apartment or getting a roommate. If you absolutely cannot function without a morning latte, accept that and get store brand groceries or drink soda when you go out with friends. It’s perfectly OK to leave yourself a few luxuries, with the key words being a few. It is way better to accept you love clothes and plan for it than to deprive yourself, get frustrated, give up and spend too much. Include in your budget a plan to pay off debt. If you don’t want to use a spreadsheet or com, you can try You Need a Budget.
3. If you are in the USA, start an IRA and begin to contribute to it. Even if it’s just $25 a month, you will begin to set up your financial future – and possibly get a tax break. Quick guide: A traditional IRA will reduce your tax bill in the year you contribute, while a Roth IRA is not taxed on gains. If you’re not making a lot right now, contribute to a Roth since it could mean tax-free growth later; if you’re trying to reduce your tax bill, contribute to a traditional. YMMV, consult a tax pro, etc.
4. Set goals and save no matter what. Think about what you really want. Do you want to go on a vacation next year with your bros? Do you want to buy a car or a house? Do you want to go to grad school? Have a destination wedding? Don’t let your post-graduation let down get in the way. Make a plan and start to make it happen. Even if you don’t have any specific spending goals, set savings and investment benchmarks for yourself. It may feel boring and abstract now, but you WILL thank yourself when you get an unexpected medical bill or have to buy a new set of tires. Try using an online savings account, such as SmartyPig, which is designed to help you save to reach goals.
5. Develop a plan for money and get in the habit of doing it. About once a week, look over your spending from the past week and making sure there are no fraudulent purchases. Every month, look for patterns, trends, and things you can do better. Every quarter, check your credit report and score. Every year (or more often if you are thinking of buying a house or car in the near future), check your credit score.

That’s it! These aren’t magical money moves to get you rich, but rather, they are habits you should get into for a less stressful post-graduate life.

One of our friendly, tweed-wearing Unemployed Professors is happy to help you tame the essay writing monster.