I did my undergraduate degree at Bond University, a rather prestigious university on the Gold Coast of Queensland, Australia. Despite the inviting prestige of the number one law school in Australia and instead of doing a 7 year medical degree in 4, I made the same decision as the majority of prospective Bond students – I enrolled in a bachelor of arts. The degree that is more commonly referred to as a bachelor of bull-shhhh(insert profanity here).

When you do an arts degree, as I’m sure most people are aware, you can choose to major in a wide variety of subjects. The list of majors is literally as long as Hagrid’s beard;  you could choose psychology, language, education, journalism, fine art, communications, or criminology, among many more things. Regardless of what major or combination of majors you choose, I declare that the bachelor of arts will teach all and any students trapped in its powerful glow three important life skills. The three secrets of an arts graduate are as follows:

1. The cunning skill of ‘stretching the truth’

The first thing a liberal arts degree will teach you is how to ‘stretch the truth’, also known as the ability to bull$%*t. You no longer have to feel uncomfortable when you are unprepared in a meeting because your liberal arts degree will teach you how to fake confidence. You no longer have to worry or feel anxious in social interactions because your liberal arts degree will teach you how to how to stretch the truth. You no longer have to worry about competing with other students for jobs because your liberal arts degree will teach you how to convert your mediocre looking resume into a high class, respectable, professional transcript. Your liberal arts degree will teach you the power to bulls$&*t through life, and this is an important skill to have.

2. The ability to ‘wing it’

Upon graduating from your liberal arts degree, you will never have to sit down and spend three hours researching that 30 minute presentation. Forget about preparing yourself for that one o’clock meeting, you now have the power to ‘wing it’ thanks to your liberal arts degree training. Turn up five minutes before your presentation with nothing planned, employ a little of those skills we talked about in point 1 and you will have your boss impressed and clapping in no time.

3. Time management

Time management was probably the most valuable lesson I learnt in my undergraduate arts degree and this skill has proved to be extremely valuable in life. What do I mean by time management? When you’re attending a class, if the topic of that particular lecture/seminar/tutorial has nothing to do with your assessment pieces, there are no participation marks, it’s not going to help you with your final exam or essays, and there is nothing remotely appealing or interesting about the topic then you don’t go. It’s as simple as that,   y o u     d o     n o t      g o, and that’s the number one secret of a liberal arts student.

That, my friends and colleagues, is the three secrets of the college arts graduate and not at all the reason why I am sitting at my computer writing this instead of working at my fancy graduate job earning big dollars………